God's Comfort

It is so easy to say you believe in God and trust in God - until your faith is tested through trials and tribulations. Then the rubber meets the road so to speak.

This week has been a continuation of testing and chances for my faith and trust to be built in God. Not only that, but also I have been given the opportunity on numerous occasions to see how God has used things and people from my past to minister to my now. He consistently amazes me. Not only does he use past people and life experience to feed the now - He also uses those that I have come to know since being in this town to teach me, bless me, meet physical, spiritual, and emotional needs right when I have needed it. I will say God has allowed me to be uncomfortable enough to get my attention. This is not always enjoyable - actually - this has not been very enjoyable at all except when I DO pay attention in these times I completely see the hand of God. There is a quote I read in a devotion for those that are members of Al-Anon. "Once again I had to sit and feel the discomfort of letting go." How true this has been for me. I am sure some of you have felt the same over various circumstances in life. When we think we have a handle on things - or when we think we know the answer and how things should play out to be the best for everyone. Something happens, though, reminds you that control is an illusion, and things around us are not what or where our focus and hearts should be - but our hearts should be focused on God and His characteristics.......like consistency and steadfastness...provider....comforter....healer. The list is longer - but you get the idea.

Last night I was concerned about my oldest daughter. I call her "Boo". It is just a nickname - don't know why or from where - it has just always been. Anyway - as a mom you want your kids to have things they want within reason. Like a certain jacket or pair of jeans - or in this case - tennis shoes. But, realistically you know that if you spend that much on a pair of shoes then you have to go without something else - like internet for a month. Well, Boo has gotten to the point that I don't think she even tells me really what she most desires anymore because she figures we can't get it right now anyway. But see how God has provided...Buckle jeans (found some for less than a third of the price at a local consignment store)....Ugg boots (my sister had some she was willing for Boo to have - not the color Boo wanted, but even that turned out good. I had to talk her into trying them - because they were orange- and she really didn't want to - but did - then lo and behold! She came home and talked so long about how everyone looooved her boots, where did she get them, etc....I of course smiled)......Crocs (her sister bought the real ones for her).....and so on. So the most recent desire has been for Converse tennis shoes. She hasn't been harping on them like Moo has - but like I said - I think that is because she is feeling the financial pinch so to speak. A child came in our office the other day with some really cute hot pink fake converse on - she had gotten them at Dollar General. I left work a little early and decided to see if I could find Moo and Boo some at the DG. The first one didn't have any in Moo's size, but had ONE pair in Boo's - in bright blue - wasn't really even sure she wanted some - but got them. Then at the next DG there were none, but being a persistent mom, I began checking the packed boxes in the shoe section - found some pink and green camo ones for Moo and a pair of tan slide on shoes for Tate! WooHooo! So, that afternoon I was able to surprise them with it all. Moo was disappointed they weren't the color she wanted - but was happy enough and Tate was overjoyed (he really likes shoes), Boo - hard to read - I couldn't really tell if she liked them or not - she said she did, but her body language also said, "they are okay, whatever." So, I was disappointed - Moo's and Tate's were too big - Boo's fit great.

So, I was telling my friend that I really felt Boo said she liked them so as to not disappoint me. I didn't want that - I want Boo to say definitively what she does and does not like/want. I do not want her just trying to put herself second in order to please people or try and make them happy or go with the flow. Keep in mind I do know that compromise is essential to every good relationship, and that the ability to go with the flow is vital. I just want her to want things from her heart and not because she feels that will make people happy.

So - her heart is what I was concerned about - and that led to the whole, "I'm not sure I am being a good mom during this season in my family." My friend assured me that I am - she reminded me I am teaching them about God, what the Bible says, and they are watching love and mercy in action in our home. I needed to hear that - and God allowed her to say it to me.

Then, I got home and here is the note left on the bed by my 12 year old, 6th grade, Boo...

"Mom,

Hey, I just wanted to say I love you. I'm not really sure if this is correct I do this or not (yes, these are her words and exactly how she wrote it), but you always give us verses. So, here's one for you: Psalms 37:7. I love you a lot!.....P.S. I'm not saying dad is evil by this verse (and a smiley face here)" She drew a big heart with an arrow running through it and at the bottom of the page she wrote,’ do not be in troubles, rise above them!'

When did she grow up? I cried without even knowing what the verse said yet, because I knew that God was reassuring me that not only did he hear my concerns earlier, but he allowed me a glimpse of what he is doing - yet again - in my children - and using that to teach me.

Thank you, Jesus, for so richly blessing me and comforting me exactly when I need it every time!!!
 
"Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes."  Psalm 37:7 (this morning she told me she meant to include verses 4-7, but still - what a treasure to see God working in my children - and to minister to me, once again, no less!)