So, yesterday I wrote about moving forward and last night I made a GIANT step in that direction. It is true that to work out an issue you seriously have to talk - talk and listen. Sometimes one is easier than the other, but both are required for resolution.
I think God knows when we need people around us to help us not over react to something. Now, whether or not we stop, take the time to talk with them, open ourselves up to that, and listen to the wisdom they may have is an entirely different story.
I can think of three major times in my adult life that I have specifically cried out to God for some sign - any sign that He was hearing me in extremely difficult situations. Each time He has given me specific signs. Now, had my heart not been open to seeing/hearing the signs I would probably be a very angry person - but He promises never to leave us or forsake us and I KNOW that from things I experienced in my childhood - no matter how bad I may have considered the situation - God always put someone or something there to lighten the load or walk with me through it. So, knowing my past experience with God helps me with my present experience.
They say the best way to determine future behavior is past behavior. I do agree with that, but not to the extent that I lose the faith God has asked me to have in Him rather than in people or circumstances. God can change anything and anybody - if the person is willing.
So, last night was good for me and my healing process.
Thank you, God.
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Learning
What I am finding out about myself is that if I stay aware of people and "things" around me after I have asked God for help, guidance, knowledge, etc., then I will hear it or see it or read it in the coming days - "It" being His answer of course.
Yes, the answer could be "no" or "wait", but He does answer. I am often just too impatient to stop and pay attention to the answers when they are coming in. This is when I often make rash and foolish decisions, or say things I regret later, or do things that I can never undo.
Have you been there? Do you know what I mean?
So, I am waiting. Waiting in the hurting, growing through this pain and uncertainty. Knowing that God IS supplying me with all I need for the moment. No more is needed (despite what my flesh may think). Now, this waiting is made more difficult for me specifically when I don't feel my family is on board with waiting on God. I may be wrong in this and my family may feel they most definitely are acting in what God is directing them in. This is when I further learn about submission to the spiritual authority in my life.
That authority is first God, then my husband, then my family, then my church. Right? I am continually being taught and stretched and made to grow for the next thing God has planned to use me in. I pray that my experiences can be used by God as a testimony to His grace, faithfulness, and patience with even me.
Yes, the answer could be "no" or "wait", but He does answer. I am often just too impatient to stop and pay attention to the answers when they are coming in. This is when I often make rash and foolish decisions, or say things I regret later, or do things that I can never undo.
Have you been there? Do you know what I mean?
So, I am waiting. Waiting in the hurting, growing through this pain and uncertainty. Knowing that God IS supplying me with all I need for the moment. No more is needed (despite what my flesh may think). Now, this waiting is made more difficult for me specifically when I don't feel my family is on board with waiting on God. I may be wrong in this and my family may feel they most definitely are acting in what God is directing them in. This is when I further learn about submission to the spiritual authority in my life.
That authority is first God, then my husband, then my family, then my church. Right? I am continually being taught and stretched and made to grow for the next thing God has planned to use me in. I pray that my experiences can be used by God as a testimony to His grace, faithfulness, and patience with even me.
Monday, June 29, 2009
Be careful what you pray for, you just might get the opportunity...
You know - it is true - when you go through something - especially if that thing is something you consider "bad" you draw into yourself and away from others. Vulnerability is not a trait that comes lightly to me.
For about two years I have been praying specifically that God would help me to become a better mother, wife, and friend. I see the good days and bad days in this, but evidently God now feels I am ready for the "fire" so to speak. I am clinging. Clinging to the knowledge that He will never leave me or forsake me, that He does have plans for my life - and this includes plans to prosper - to bring hope and a future - not harm. I am also clinging to the fact that He promises that despite the trials and tribulations of this world - He has overcome the world and as His child I am protected.
I was reminded yesterday that God is in the middle of refining me. Unfortunately this includes "fire". I would - in my flesh - just like to lay down and curl up in His lap and that be it- but that does not bring about true change - the change I have been praying for - to be a better mother - wife - friend. So - as this "firing" process continues and I am learning anew what surrender to Christ really means - bear with me.
I am waiting on God - waiting to see the story He is going to write out of this season of my life in order to bring others closer to Him - if even one person can benefit from help through my "fire" then PRAISE GOD!!
But, please Lord, right now - just get me through it in a way that is pleasing to YOU! Not in the way that my flesh feels is easiest or least painful - please guide my steps, thoughts, words, and actions in the coming days and months.
Thank you, Jesus, for loving me in spite of me, and in turn teaching me how to truly love others even when hurt and distrustful.
For about two years I have been praying specifically that God would help me to become a better mother, wife, and friend. I see the good days and bad days in this, but evidently God now feels I am ready for the "fire" so to speak. I am clinging. Clinging to the knowledge that He will never leave me or forsake me, that He does have plans for my life - and this includes plans to prosper - to bring hope and a future - not harm. I am also clinging to the fact that He promises that despite the trials and tribulations of this world - He has overcome the world and as His child I am protected.
I was reminded yesterday that God is in the middle of refining me. Unfortunately this includes "fire". I would - in my flesh - just like to lay down and curl up in His lap and that be it- but that does not bring about true change - the change I have been praying for - to be a better mother - wife - friend. So - as this "firing" process continues and I am learning anew what surrender to Christ really means - bear with me.
I am waiting on God - waiting to see the story He is going to write out of this season of my life in order to bring others closer to Him - if even one person can benefit from help through my "fire" then PRAISE GOD!!
But, please Lord, right now - just get me through it in a way that is pleasing to YOU! Not in the way that my flesh feels is easiest or least painful - please guide my steps, thoughts, words, and actions in the coming days and months.
Thank you, Jesus, for loving me in spite of me, and in turn teaching me how to truly love others even when hurt and distrustful.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)