The sun is out!

Where I live we have had rain for literally 6 solid weeks. A total of what I think I heard to be about 22" this last month and a half. Yes, there have been breaks in that rain - like for 3-10 hours, but no sun to speak of. This last week it seemed like everyone around me was complaining about the rain - "will it ever stop?", "will we ever see sun again?", "let me move to California", "look what this rain has done", etc. Did I stay inside my 'perfect' self and not complain? ......uhhhhhhhh - no. I, too, found myself bemoaning all I had to do in the rain, and all the problems the rain was causing in my life. Ballgames, chauffeur to practices, grocery shopping, work - yard flooding, wet/nasty/muddy dog, streets flooding and having to take other routes to work, etc. (oh woe is me!) Then, as I said, there was about a day's break in the rain - no real sun, but enough of a break where I started planning things for the days to come (because I so very much wanted this break from the rain to be real and lasting - you know? Exhausted from the stormy weather - eagerly anticipating its passing and willing to grab hold of anything resembling a break - even though the sun isn't really out so no real change in weather can be counted on - but I am so desperate, I choose to ignore this small detail) specifically to take time off and help my husband finally be able to start the metal roofing process. Taking down and replacing fascia board around the eaves, painting said wood, painting gutters, rehanging gutters, and putting on the roof - to include cutting a ridge vent in the top and taking out the old attic vents. Lots to do - materials purchased (well except the paint and some of the wood) - seemingly ready to go.

So, I took the days off - Thursday and Friday of my kids' fall break so we could all work together. I don't get paid for time off in my current job, so to me this was a big deal. Anyway, as the day approached the forecast got worse and worse - to the point that in my prayer time I even moaned out loud about it to God.

Immediate conviction. I appreciated it, too. I hate it when I walk around not knowing I am doing wrong - I liked the immediacy of this one. So, with that conviction came new sight. I heard all the people around me complaining and recognized what I must be sounding like. I turned back to God and asked His forgiveness, and to show me what He would have me do and learn from this. He did (told you He was/is faithful!). So, my heart changed toward the rain - I began to reflect over the past six weeks and all that has gone on - but also what healing has come from being forced into more "togetherness" as a family because of the limiting power of the rain. Had it not been for this period of rain, and rain, and rain in my town my husband probably would have begun work on the house projects alone (and may still, but keep reading). With him working on the outside of the house I would have been dictating what was happening inside (yes, dictating) and taking the kids all to practices, games, parties, etc. We would not have had to be together because divide and conquer has 'worked' so efficiently in the past. (Riiiiiiiight)

God taught me differently. The rain forced togetherness at a time when we would probably have rather been apart - even while together (trust me, this is, unfortunately, possible to do). But, instead, we went to games together (even when irritated with one another), played Wii as a family (this is so much fun!), and watched family movies, cooked (yes, I cooked - don't faint at that - and they actually ate it all and like it), went to church, slept in, had kids' friends over, watched football, visited with family, etc. We (my husband and I) were also forced to finally talk and talking brought on the beginning of healing - still in this process, but, wow!, so much better - and all because of the rain. I like rain. I appreciate what it has allowed for my family, and for its refreshing properties.

So, I am allowed this insight for my life and then literally - two days later the sun out, again. So much so that I had to open the window all the way to look at the sky and try and determine if it would be an 'all day' kind of sun, or just a 'tease'. Nope, definitely an 'all day' kind of sun that day - and now we are almost four days later and it is still here. A break. Which brings me full circle. After a complete day of the sun shining I stopped looking at the sky trying to determine when the clouds would return. (How often have I done that lately in my personal life? Had a 'break' in the clouds - assumed it was really the sun - jumped in with both feet planning, living, etc -only to have the clouds and rain return? How much have I not appreciated that?) That night I realized that I hadn't heard people around me even talking about rain anymore (I mean, really, who wants to relive what had been so 'bad'?). You would probably have to have been around this area the last week to really understand how LOUD that silence really was (But, the lack of talking about the bad can actually keep others from learning from what you learned during that time - just talking about it won't make the 'rain' come back). It made me think about me and my own spiritual life (yes, again). How that is exactly how I am too much of the time. Thankful for the rain at first -it is a change in weather after all (shakes things up - uproots at times, washes away dirt, grime, 'illusions') - then I feel I have had enough (I mean, we all reach our limits, right?)- then I start complaining. First to myself, then out loud - then others join in and we have a real pity party chorus going on (oh, woe is me!! my problems are so bad - so much worse here than there)- until that ONE VOICE in the rain speaks against all the others - reminding me that rain really isn't so bad - reminding me of all it gives to the environment, people, etc. (in other words reminding me of promises made to me, asking me to trust the 'son' even when the 'clouds' are looming near - not to discount the 'son' all together). Not really the words we (the chorusing crowd) want to hear necessarily, but once the words are out we are forced to reassess - that can be uncomfortable - but some do and some don't - then we slowly divide - Those of us that don't at all agree with that ONE VOICE just go on about our business - complaining or whatever. The others of us that recognize some truth in ONE VOICE stop and look around. We want to complain still, because that has become comfortable, but are not really sure if anyone else will join in - we are almost more afraid they will because we know we really don't want them to since that Voice was right after all. So, we sit quietly -hopefully reflecting - some even dare to join the Voice, but mainly we just sit uncomfortably looking inside us and thinking- and yes, that can bring about good eventually, but we have to do something with the truth we have learned for that 'good' to be seen and appreciated. This takes faith. Faith that the sun really is still there - despite what the current circumstances look like right now. Faith that no matter how muddy things are, or how deep the water is - the 'son' is there and willing to help us with those issues.

Then..................the sun does come out! So, we LEAP back into life and all its running around - trying to take advantage of this break in the rain/storms of late - and some of us even move on to 'sun worship'-while this can be a good thing we tend to forget about the rain, our discomfort, what we learned from the Voice, and all of it because we are comfortable again!! WooHoooo!! (we just really don't want anymore rain for a loooooong time - tired of discomfort - almost fearful of it returning too soon)

I see, now, that I don't want to just be comfortable -I don't like constant rain, mind you, but, I don't want to forget what it that time of rain and storms felt like, either. I won't even go as far as saying I want to live in the rain, but I am far enough along that I can say I so appreciate and benefit from what it brings when it comes - so I don't want to forget the rain, or fear its return in my future - because I know I always have the "Son" no matter what the forecast (satan) is currently saying about how bad it is or how bad it is yet to be.

The sun is out, though, and begs to be appreciated and utilized and trusted. The rain has done its part (for now), but it just might be really okay to enjoy the sun for a bit.

I pray I do not become complacent in my "Son" worship- that I do appreciate the growth that comes withe sun following the rain - while not forgetting the lessons learned and strength gained from the storms. That I relive, and tell others of the miracles, and growth, and awesome rescues that occurred during those "storms of '09" only by the hand, grace, mercy, and love of my Savior, the Son, Jesus Christ!

Lord, let the 'Son' shine through me!!

"For if you (Reeda) remain silent at this time (whether clear or storming), relief and deliverance for the Jews (those around you- family, friends, coworkers, patients) will arise from another place (God is giving you the opportunity to be used, but you do have free will. If you choose not to speak up then God will use someone else- but His Will will be fulfilled), but you and your father's family will perish (literally and figuratively - do you really want to miss out on God's awesome blessing for your life just by being obedient to Him? or for the lives of your children - the blessings that could be for them if you obey - heed God's direction - continue to sink your roots in!). And who knows but that you have come to royal position (royal 'pain'? 'suffering royally'? we have all said something like this before, but what if we are really supposed to be 'royally thankful' no matter our situation or 'lowly/feeling like we are drowning in the storm' position?) for such a time as this (right NOW!, right where YOU ARE!, rain or shine!)?"Esther 4:13-15