The Eye of the Storm

You know how when a hurricane blows through, the winds and rain and storms preceding it are vicious - then there is this eerie calm. That is the eye of the storm. The break before the completion of the storm - which the end of the storm usually has more wind and rain, but does not always seem as violent as the beginning. Could be though, that after the eye passes us we are more prepared for the winds and rains that follow. They aren't maybe necessarily weaker than the beginning, but we are "shored up" - buttoned up and battened down so to speak. We are stronger in having survived the first of the storm and then given a rest period we were able to prepare further.



The eye may not last long -or it could be hours or days. Metaphorically speaking I am in the eye. Maybe not - maybe there will be no further wind, rain, or storms to follow the one I have just come through, but that does not seem the pattern for life. I do believe God knows EXACTLY how much you can handle and then, once He has us where He needs us to be - to complete our purpose - He gives us new strength and a rest period.



Now, I in no way believe that we are just supposed to sit on our "duff" so to speak. We are supposed to learn from what we have gone through and continue to look for God's plan and guidance - HIS WILL. Too often I have become complacent after "storms" in my life. I sit back and soak up the rest period instead of actively looking for what I can do next to continue in the growth. I tend to be beaten down to a point - mentally, physically, spiritually. How does that song go? "Crushed but not destroyed, persecuted not abandoned"?



So, here we are - September 15th and so far in the last month we have had two wrecked vehicles (one we were not at fault), my husband moved out, my husband moved back, my 10 yo was diagnosed with an "enlarged optic nerve head" - and all that has come from that (CT scan scheduled for this Friday- already had the sonogram), dentist appts, cheer practice for two different children - along with games each weekend, the Swine Flu in myself and my six year old (and we suspect my husband, too), and constant nights of interrupted sleep from my six year old's stomach issues. Lets add school work, projects, selling things for school, grocery shopping, laundry, household chores, baseball registration, practice, and meetings - GOOD LAND!! I guess this "eye" is needed. This is just the last month's activities.



So, looking back on all of that there is no wonder I am physically and mentally exhausted. Some days I think of sleeping all day. I don't - I work full time, but I think about it. I will say that if my husband had not cleaned this past weekend nothing would have been touched. I did end up helping some, but nothing like what he and two of the kids did together while I ran errands and went to ball games. I don't mean to come across as "poor pitiful me" - not at all - I am SO BLESSED!! God has provided people around me to help take/pick up/and keep children as needed. He has provided friends that have prayed with me and listened to me. He has provided family to support without question, and some with questions - but hey - its family ;o). Spiritually I am eager for that feeding. I need my time with God. I am a better person for having spent time in His presence - I am just so very thankful for this "eye" in my personal storm right now. I look forward to continued growth and learning and also for this rest. So, if I haven't called, written, or otherwise communicated - it is not because I am not thinking of you or praying for you, it is simply because my brain is resting.



"In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith - of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire - may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory, and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls."....."Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given to you when Jesus Christ is revealed." I Peter 1:6-9 and 13.



I have definitely experienced Jesus' grace throughout this summer, along with the gift of seeing Him in it through all of it. Thank you again, Jesus. I love you.