Food

For me FOOD really is a four letter word.
Seriously - how many self help books, diets, diet medications, etc. are there out there for those like me that simply love food (especially sweets and breads) to the point of getting their child out of bed at 8 o'clock at night to get them to go to the store - why? you ask - because you are already in your pj's - and they are pj's - and your child's look like their day clothes (what does that say?) and they can go in for you and get away with it.
HAD to have that ice cream. I know - not many, huh? Was really doing so well - I have probably spent more time praying about and trying to do something about this issue in the last year of my life more than almost anything else.
I have joined an excercise class on Saturdays as a small group from my church - truly love this group. The leader is like the epitome if what I would like my body to look like - only mine is about 7" shorter than hers :D
Today I can say I am trying - but maybe that is part of the overall problem - have been told that it appears to be a spiritual issue for me - I have, to date - completed Eat Right, Weight Watchers, and going to a doctor for medication and education.
Seriously - at this point I am quite the expert on calories, fat, protein, what amount I should take in - what amount I need to burn off - how many steps I should walk a day - etc.
So what is my problem?
Well - I like my tv - I like the table - I like the ice cream - I love to celebrate and mourn with food - I like just about everything that is bad for me that is socially acceptable - haven't ever tried alcohol so don't count that - And my list of what I don't like goes like this -
Don't like getting up early to excercise, don't like being this big, don't like failing, don't like being this big - don't like being tired
Was challenged the other day by a statement made - "You are telling yourself that you are wearing the weight well"
Really? Am I? Maybe so - Really hate to look at it that way.
So, I am trying something revolutionary - Absolutely nothing
No counting calories, no restricting myself, no saying I can't have that - but also recognizing my fleshly weakness - ice cream - exhaustion - do you know I find myself sitting up to eat because I am tired? What sense does that make? Why don't I just go to bed?
Probably because I want to eat - what a vicious cycle!!!
In addition to letting go of what the world says and focusing on what God says - WOW!!
How simple............yes - and hopefully I will grow and change in ALL ways - grow spiritually, tone up and shrink physically and be able to proclaim - I was changed by the grace and strength of GOD - not Jenny, Weight wathchers, nutrisystem, etc........
I am not perfect, but I have been set FREE!!! Galatians 5:1

Music

Music is probably the main way my soul hears from God -
Thanks to my Grandmother on my mom's side music was a vital part of my life from a very young age. GM could play the piano soooo well and would have my siblings and I sing every day she was with us on a visit. She also had us singing in her church any time we went to visit her.
The Gaither family was a huge influence on what we sang - Down by the Creekbank was my personal favorite as well as certain hymns she would do.
Anyway - even though God did not gift me with the ability to carry a tune in a bucket, He did give to me an awesome love of music - all kinds of music, but especially music that told stories - hymns, country, Christian, - anything.
I also love to move - again - I can't actually dance well, but I do have rhythm. That is something I took for granted until I met my husband (love you honey!). Really did believe everybody could move to music. He tries - unfortunately he is usually one step behind. But, you know what - the beauty is he tries! Just like I try to sing - I am always a couple of notes off, but I give it all I've got! Isn't that what God asks of us? To give it all we have? Everything?
In Ephesians 6:7 Paul is instructing us to do EVERYTHING as if we are doing so unto the Lord.
I hear that as not just work - but everything we do - because we have the ability to build up the Kingdom of Heaven even with what we may see as the smallest of deeds - like spending that moment listening to our child's story, or looking at their comic they made - or taking that meal to a neighbor or person in need - even though you may be busy - spending a couple of hours out of your week to serve the less fortunate - not just meet the needs of your own family (not that there is anything wrong with that, but sometimes we can become so focused on ourselves - even for good and necessary things - that we forget that God called us to do more - serve others).
I have trouble balancing at times - I don't want to serve so much that I neglect my own family's needs, but I also don't want to stand before Christ one day and have Him ask me why I didn't meet the needs of those I came in contact with when prompted by the Spirit.
The Bible also says in Galatians that we will be known by our fruit - if there is no fruit - there is no life. So, if we are Christians and LIVING in Christ, then we should be bearing the fruits of the Spirit - Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Gentleness, and Self Control.
Honestly some of these fruits come off me in abundance and others I am still trying to allow Christ to cultivate inside me so I can share them.
So, whether you can sing and dance (or not), or paint, or serve, or pray, or befriend - do whatever you are called to do with your WHOLE HEART as unto the Lord!
Your blessings will be plentiful!
I encourage you to read Galatians and Ephesians today!

Frustration

Have you ever worked on something - poured your heart into it for that day and then lose it? Actually have it disappear - and no amount of searching brings it back.
Okay - that is me today.
Heartfelt and compelling ( I think) post - VANISHED! somehow it edited to only a few words and then went away.
I am choosing not to be frustrated. I know that is easier said than done, but I will not be frustrated.
Just know that God continues to move in me, change my heart, and change my life - I am continuing to choose Him daily and am learning that trusting Him completely with EVERYTHING is exactly what He demands of my life -
I don't want to be that child in the desert roaming because I choose not to listen.
I am thankful for His patience and grace and love for me.
I will today choose to serve Him, trust Him, lean on Him no matter how difficult it may feel at the time - Philippians 4:13 assures me I CAN do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength - He knows I can't do it on my own strength - I am weak and that is exactly when He is strong if I allow it -
But go to the verse before that one - read it - Philippians 4:12.....I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in poverty or wealth.....
I am in the process of being taught that secret.
No matter what - to be content - not to conform to this world - but to continuously be transformed through knowing Him more.
Not to worry about what others may think of me, my appearance, my children or any other worldly measuring point - to be content with what He has for me - right now - because if I am always looking ahead or behind - I miss the now part of life.
Plans are good, but God has the ultimate plan for us - He says so in Jeremiah 29:11- I so love that verse! What a great reminder!
So, as I continue on my journey in life - I am learning that there is nothing more important than my relationship with Christ and what I do with that relationship.
Do I go to Him when upset, happy, mourning, celebrating? Or do I turn to friends or food?
Do I ignore my time with Him to watch TV or sleep later? Do I keep Him all to myself and never tell others about Him? or is it really that I talk about Him, but when others look at me they think it must just be lip service because they see no difference in me?
This is just a revelation I am having about me, my relationship with Christ - what I consider more important than Him and why I will never understand the secret in Philippians 4:12 if I do not better know the Author.
Here I GROW!!! Praise God!

New Days!

So, here I am almost three months later - updating. This summer has been fabulous! The kids were all kept at our home by a babysitter - many adventures were had: McWane Center for Science, Alabama Adventure, Library Reading Club, Wednesday free movies, and lots of play (and cleaning - this they didn't like so much!).
I was also lead by the Spirit to lead a church small group - fabulous! Now even more ministry opportunities have come from that.
I have started a new job. LOVE IT! Lots more time with my husband and children.
Poodleduck started Kindergarten this year. It has been so great listening to him and watching him grow. He makes friends with girls easily - maybe even a little too easily - but he really likes girls :) He held hands with a girl during naptime the first day of school - "What is her name?" we all asked him - He shrugged and said "I don't know, but she is my friend". How simplistic and how sweet - It reminded me of how complicated we "grown ups" try and make everything be.
So much has happened in my life personally and in the lives of friends I have that I try very hard not to get bogged down in the details and focus on the now - Sometimes I think I do this to an extreme and sometimes I don't get up far enough out of the trees to see the forest - God is doing such awesome work in me right now.
I give God all the praise and glory for everything good about me, my marriage, my children, and my possessions. The bad I ask Him to help me with and learn daily more about relying on Him and His word - not my "feelings" - Helping my kids navigate the daily situations is soooo not easy, but I trust in God that what He says is true - Philippians 4:13; Romans 8:28; Jeremiah 29:11 - and on and on and on. He gives constant reminders of His plans, His past accomplishments and the glory of the now.
We have family coming in at the end of the month - we are all so excited they are coming! Lots of fun planned for us all - the girls have a game on Saturday, but Sunday after church we plan to take them to Alabama Adventure! How great is that - if you haven't been and live in the area - now is a great time because tickets for both parks are only $19.99.
Have a fabulous week (month or three :) )!
Hebrews 13:2

Life Lessons

Where oh where to begin? I have so much to update - as usual!! Poodleduck has been in a study for his EGE - things weren't so good the first month, but oh, so much better now! God is great!! I am so blessed to be involved in a small group at my church that teaches the women in it, not only how to better provide for their families by getting the best deals on groceries - but that also teaches us about relationships, prayer, and how God works in even the most minute ways if we stop long enough to pay attention.

I have prayerfully been considering for months about leaving my current job of 7 years. My husband and I feel it is time. Not because I "hate my job", but seriously because my job interferes with my ability to be the best mom and wife I possibly can. Not only do I depend on my job for my "security" and "identity", but also because in my heart of hearts I think I have really been thinking this is what God's plan for my life is. Not so - He has SO MUCH more in store for me and my family. I do not have to be just in one place or at one job to touch the lives of others and make a difference in His kingdom. How great is that? I used to think I had to go off to another country to be a "missionary" - finally I realized there was a mission field right here in my own country - literally my own back yard - went into social work for that purpose - to be mobile and to touch the lives of others. Of course looking back I think I could have done this as anything and made a little more money:) Kidding - I do think God's intention is to bless us - just like the promise in Jeremiah 29 - His plan is to prosper us....... I just have to be willing to be used and then use the gifts He has given me wisely - One of the most precious gifts He has bestowed is my husband and my children. I used to not feel this way - I used to really look forward to going to work - now I look forward to talking with my kids - learning about their friends - teaching them what I know and learning from them. Sometimes fun - sometimes not!! I also am being stretched as a wife - to grow and submit and learn more about what God's plan for the wife is - so all this rambling to say - God is really growing me - like all growing - there is sometimes pain - and sometimes having to look in the mirror and see that I have grown in the wrong direction! and then get back in line - I am truly walking in His grace and covering daily - - He constantly provides friends and songs and sermons and calls to remind me and put me back right where I need to be or sometimes to push me forward to where He has me going. I am LOVING this!!! So - all this to say - I am saying goodbye to a much loved and very emotionally heavy job - to move on to an even better calling for this season - MOM/WIFE

Wish me luck and blessings as I try to follow HIS path in all of this and truly walk in my faith!